Monday, April 20, 2009

The Fat Lady (Skinny CrossFitter) Sang

Hi Lauren, it’s me.

Just got off the phone with the CrossFit Radio guys. It was a lot of fun. (Big howdy and thanks to Neil and Justin.) I think the show will generate some visitors to the site, which is cool, but all I can think about is “Why did I ever post that photo of me in my underwear?”

Anyway, I didn’t get the call so I sang as promised/threatened. Doc said my ears should recover - mostly. Here’s the lyrics in case you missed it.

Come and listen to my story ‘bout a man named Rob.
A poor CrossFitter just trying to get a job.
And then one day as if in answer to his plea,
He saw a post from Lauren, said “Come and work for me.”
Glassman that is, Lauren G, Coach’s wife.


Well the first thing you know Rob’s sent his resumé.
The kinfolk said, you better rise above the fray.
They said Lauren’s struggling with a resumé backlog,
So he loaded up his thoughts and he starts to write a blog.
Stories that is, articles, anecdotes.

So, it’s time for my next stunt, and I gotta tell you I’m at a bit of a loss. If the singing threat didn’t work, you must be a pretty tough nut to crack. I thought about holding my breath, but I don’t think that will work long distance. A hunger strike seems totally inappropriate. I could take a hostage, but who? Maybe I could boycott something.

Then it hit me:
THE GREAT, NOBLE & EPIC
LAUREN CALL ROB
100 BURPEE CHALLENGE INVITATIONAL

Here’s how it works: Starting tomorrow, April 21, (which is my birthday by the way) I pledge to do 100 burpees a day, in addition to my workouts, every day until you call. (God, I hope this doesn’t take long.)

I’m going to design a logo, and ask all my CrossFit buddies to pledge with me, and everyone who does gets a logoed shirt or something, and we’ll all get damn sick and tired of burpees to boot.

There it is. 100 burpees a day for a phone call.
In case you don’t have it yet: 417-839-5133.

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